Trump is Terrified of Teenagers.
The coronavirus pandemic shows no signs of ending in the United States, but America, worry not, for your president has found the real problem plaguing this country: TikTok. Forget the pandemic that’s infected over 5 million Americans and killed upwards of 165,000, we must act immediately to rid this nation of a social media app mostly used by teenagers to record videos of themselves dancing. It’s a security threat, apparently? Hold on, that’s not right. Back in June, teenagers used the app to trick Trump into thinking thousands of people wanted to attend his moronic campaign rally in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Yea, there’s the real reason. Young folks proved that they have the potential to be a powerful political force. If they could organize themselves and screw up Trump’s rally, they could just as easily vote him out of office.
In American politics, young people have always been the elusive untapped well of voters. Election after election, year after year, presidential campaigns try every trick they can think of to get young Americans to vote: concerts, internet advertisements, celebrity endorsements, clever campaign slogans, and kitschy merchandise. None of these efforts have proven to be particularly successful. Voters under 29 have the lowest turnout rates. The younger you are, the less likely you are to vote. It’s a damn shame, too, as young people could radically change the face of American politics if they voted in large numbers.
Republicans know this and they also know that if young Americans increased their turnout rates, they would have considerably less power. The GOP works hard to suppress the youth vote, but it’s not really necessary. The majority of young Americans don’t vote, so they were never considered a major threat to the political status quo.
Enter: Donald Trump. Young people, en masse, used a social media app to make Trump believe thousands were going to attend his Tulsa rally. No question about it, Trump got played. It was like a scene out of a high school cafeteria. The nation’s foremost bully, who gets his kicks out of using the powers of the presidency to torture and humiliate the most vulnerable members of society, got it handed right back at him. As it became clear no one was attending the rally, these teenagers took a well-earned victory lap, claimed responsibility for Trump’s public humiliation, and explained how they pulled it off using TikTok. Like all good dictators, or in Trump’s case an aspiring dictator, he can’t stand to be laughed at. Trump wants revenge and he thinks he’s accomplishing this by attempting to ban TikTok. Too bad it’s not going to work.
Putting the legality of Trump’s executive order aside, trying to take away something from teenagers is only going to make them want it more. Even if Trump did somehow ban TikTok, there will be countless other social media apps to fill the void. (Instagram has already rolled out its new feature called Reels, which looks suspiciously like TikTok.) The more Trump escalates his war with young folks, the more power they are going to realize they have over him. For teenagers, there is nothing more satisfying than provoking a hysterical reaction from the guy supposedly in charge. Trump is, ironically, doing more to engage the youth vote than any of his predecessors. So go ahead Gen Z, use social media to participate in grassroots activism, and encourage your peers to vote in November. I promise, if you thought Trump was mad when he got stood up at his rally, he will be absolutely irate if you overwhelmingly vote him out. This millennial will be proudly cheering you on. See you at the polls!
